I just came from the beginning of a six month course in awareness. Such spaciousness and access to infinity. Then a friend tagged me to a post sharing one man’s process of viscerally accessing deep grief. For me the two processes are unified. My moments of being lovingly held as I accessed extreme primal grief have been so instrumental in giving me access to expansive, loving awareness. I have met so many stuck, as I perceive it, in a level of awareness where they are “above the field,” frozen or unable to access embodiment, using false rather then true denial. Avoiding looking at their own trauma. Using meditation and awareness/consciousness as an escape.
Ultimately I believe we access freedom by being able to hold with all that arises in true spaciousness not as a denial or a pulling away from, rather with a total being with. Will post the video in the comments.
OMG see how the dream I had about snakes I wrote about in the previous post, the relationship dilemma where I had been blaming another for how I feel, the still thinking some new external experience (in my case in person community) would finally create lasting peace all tie together in the 59th Gene key represented by the snake. YES: “To get to a place where someone else’s behavior no longer triggers our heart to close.” Richard Rudd https://soundcloud.com/gene-keys/59th_gene_key_audio.
DREAM ABOUT SNAKES
Woke up from a very powerful dream that I thought was real. In the dream two long but very thin snakes were entering over the threshold of the house. The male figure said to let them in. I said what about our child? She could be harmed. He thought about it and then decided to chase them out. One left but the other one was missing.
Suddenly I felt the snake crawl up my pants leg. I became terrified and frozen but totally still. The snake eventually moved into my hair and wrapped itself in my hair. I begged the male figure to get it out. Finally he started to try but when he tried the snake bit my head and wouldn’t let go. I wondered if the snake was poisonous. I also wondered if I was in a dream and I hoped I would wake up.
When I actually woke up and realized it was a dream I felt such relief and the dream was incredibly vivid. I’m only writing it down hours later and it’s still super alive. Wanted to get it down so that I have a chance to look at it later. If anybody has any impressions I’d welcome them.
