My daughter just faced one of her deepest fears by agreeing to take a much more significant role then she has ever taken in a class play AND to sing a solo. Through the years, she has been terrified to speak even just in front of her class. So to do five performances in front of a fairly large audience really pushed her buttons. Supported by her teacher and friends, she made the choice to face the fear. In dress rehearsal she froze in panic yet during the actually performances, she remembered her lyrics. Her voice was initially very quiet yet grew louder with each performance, fueled by the incredible support of her classmates, teacher and the parent body. May parents were moved to tears in recognition of my daughter’s growth and courage. Afterwards my daughter and I spoke of fear. I asked her if it was as difficult as she imagined and she acknowledged it was not. I told her if she learns not to let fear stop her, knowing this truth already at 14 will be one of the best catalyst to a good life.
How do we feel the fear and do it anyway? How do we not let fear paralyze us? I think the only way is to just do it, allowing the fear to arise as a physical sensation in the body but not to let it rule us. These are times of extreme fear and anxiety, fueled by so much uncertainty. Do we curl up and stay in bed or face it? Each of us must decide for ourselves. For me the image of my death bed keeps me choosing to face fear, again and again. In college I had a poster that said “he not busy being born, is busy dying” or something like that. It seems this being born into each new moment often requires moving through fear. Yet this choice is better then the alternative, dying after an unlived life.