Yesterday noticing envy arising at a friend’s good fortune led to a fairly significant self abandonment, like my life is nothing compared to hers. Chose to stay with that energy and had the choice to be guided in an inquiry this morning that took me deep into a primal grief of not being held as a child in this one’s sensitivity and big emotions. Emotions were verboten in my family except one person’s rage. The person who facilitated the inquiry is today’s earth angel as i am truly stunned at his ability to sense the deeper grief and give it room and space. I felt incredibly held by him and the group. This one felt very intense indeed.
Also playing with how safety hold us back from the deepest annihilation which it seems is the ultimate end of this playground, to be annihilated from a personal self into the primordial field of One. Trauma insist we play safe. To move through that field of grief and trauma until enough Presence is available to let go of all of it, for me this is the deepest invitation.
